Daddy , A Daughter's First Love

     This past Father's Day, I gladly celebrated it with my bonus daughter and niece as we doted on and lavished Mr. Awesome with lots of appreciation for his role in our lives and to let him know how much we love him.  Although we celebrated him on this day, I could not help but to reminisce of my own father who passed away over eight years ago.  I wished very much that I could call him and tell him that I am very thankful that he was in my life and that he never left my brother or I to wonder where he was or if he was coming home.  The older that I get and the more people that I meet in life who suffer from wounds that stem from an absent father,  I realize how blessed I was to have him as a dad.  He was not perfect and neither was our life, but I stand thankful for always being able to say that I had an active father in my life.

     As they say, a dad is his daughter's first love.  He is the one who gives her a standard of what a man, father, and husband should look like.  He is the one who helps to validate the beauty within her.  He is her first example of what a man's protection should be, what his provisions for his family should be, and what his leadership of the family should be.  He is the umbrella of safety for her until she grows up and is joined to a husband of her own.  I did see a great deal of these things while growing into a young lady.  I witnessed seeing how a man leads his family, faithfully provides for, and how he protects his family.  Concerning the protection aspect of it alone, I really believed that God spared me from experiencing abuse that did happen within my family tree, because of my dad's rugged, tough, and protective demeanor.  Not too many people crossed him the wrong way.  I remember being a teenager at my first job and there was a guy who was picking on me for some unknown reason.  I called home because I was upset and before I could hang up the phone, my dad (and brother)  were standing at the front counter of the restaurant while pointing at the guy.  I don't know what was said to that guy in the corner of that restaurant that evening, but he never bothered me again.

     With all of the positive examples that I did get from my father, there was one thing in particular that I felt that I did lack, the emotional connection. Because of this, I sometimes doubted his love for me and looked for the emotional connection in the wrong places as I was coming of age.  However,  my doubts were extinguished as we were able to spend quality time alone before he passed away.  It was during this time that I felt that emotional connection with him only to realize that it was there all along.

     I wish that I could tell my father how much his presence in my life had blessed me, but for now I am thankful for the good standards that I had been given by him.  As I look at Mr. Awesome, I realized that he fits the good examples that my dad did set for me.  He is the priest, provider, and protector of our home and is thriving in his God-given role.  I feel very proud to be his wife and as I look at the example that he is giving my bonus daughter and niece, I am assured that their husbands will have to be great men of God too. 


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