If It's Ain' Broke, Why Fix It? Part II

     Continuing from the post last week, I felt it necessary to elaborate on the reasons why being content with co-habitation without marrying is not a good idea. 

False sense of commitment.   When there is co-habitation there is the fallacy  that it is just like
         being married.  However, with this notion that no matter how
         much time you invest, emotions that you tie into, or finances that you entangle, you can always
         walk away from the situation if the partner simply sneezes the wrong way.  This notion sets the
         partners up for a selfish type of love that only seeks to serve the interests of each individual
         person and not the partnership as a whole.  With marriage vows, you are already making the
         commitment to weather the storms of life and the  good times as well as to stay with the  
         person even if they sneeze too loudly.


Example for the children.  Many people don't really think about the example that they are setting
         for the children that may be a part of this equation, but this is not a good legacy to leave.  One
         of the biggest thought provoking questions that I have asked in these discussions before was 
         "Would you teach your daughter to let a man take all the benefits of having a wife from her   
         without a full commitment?"  We all know the saying, "Why buy the cow when the milk is
         free?" What type of example is this for the children?


False sense of financial freedom.  As is the case with the co-worker of Mr. Awesome, many people
        feel that splitting the bills down the middle is a great deal.  The fact is that it is nothing more
        than a roommate situation with other "benefits".  With a situation like that, there is no
        goal of growing your wealth together and using it for the greater good.  It is more about self
        preservation.

False sense of " I will get to know their bad habits to see if I can deal with them".  This is my
       favorite one, the try it before you buy it fallacy.  The fact of the matter is that you do not have to
       live with someone first to see if they have quirks that you find annoying.  You do not have to live
       with them to see if they are messy,  play Xbox all day, or lie constantly.  You can see those
       things with enough time, attention, and prayer before you get married.  And it does not have to
       take ten years of living together to figure it out.  No one is that slow.

     Like I previously stated, some people have lived together prior to marriage and have since married and have successful marriages, but I believe that these people are a rare few.  However, for the majority of those who feel that they need to try it before they buy it, it is not good to believe the hype.  The selfish nature that this type of thinking promotes is not a good character trait to have in any relationship.

Ephesians 5, Hebrews 13:4